Choices-A How Too

Aug 22

When I was just 14 I got pregnant with my now 26 year old son, Alex.

My parents had just been through a bitter divorce, after experiencing all the things, joblessness, a death in the family, alcoholism, etc.

I was lost.

But at 14, I was able to say no to abortion. I was able to say no to adoption. (I’m adopted, that would never have been a yes for me)

I had to endure daily attacks, gaslighting, and manipulation. Because everyone knew what I needed to do. And assumed I didn’t.

I needed to have an abortion they said.

If I really loved my baby, I’d give him away to someone who could care for him better than I could. (This idea has always been gaslighting. It worked on my own mother, but not on me)

See I knew that even adoptive families struggled. I knew they could suffer homelessness and addiction as well.

There ARE NO GUARANTEES

SO I had to make the choice I COULD LIVE WITH

I came with a price tag. A receipt.

So now I’m committed to NEVER allow my body to be party to any transaction again.

I instinctively knew that at 14. And I know that today.

I won’t put something in my body to make you feel safe, or to get belonging.

I’m used to not belonging.

I’m ok with being the outcast.

I’m fine with holding all of your projections.

My wish for everyone who is feeling pressure is to think back to a time they said NO with every cell of their body.

I don’t for a moment think that experience is unique to me.

Remember how you felt in your body at that moment. And make whatever choice you need to make from that place.

Say “Yes” how does it feel?

Say “No” how does it feel?

Which is true?

Go with that one.

You don’t know? That’s a valid choice too. Don’t let anyone pressure you to make a choice before you are ready.

Making a choice is a completely different frequency than making a decision.

A decision is based on a list of pro’s and con’s. Usually the decision is the one with fewer con’s.

A choice is made because you are a stand in it.

Will there be consequences of your choice? Maybe.

Was there with my son? Of course, but I could live with them. Because I chose that.

Why did I choose to have my son? Because that was my choice. End of.

You don’t defend a choice. There aren’t “reasons” for a choice. A choice is a choice because it is.

Damascena Tanis

Damascena is an Archetypal Astrologer, Ayurvedic Wellness Practitioner, and The Facilitator of the Transformative Journey through the Mandala of Venus’ Wisdom, called “Sky Dancer”.

She is a passionate devotee of the ever unfolding mystery. As an expert observer, a trait she developed as an only child, she regards herself as both a student of life, and decoder of the cosmos.

Skilled at recognizing invisible patterns, and picking up on subtle shifts in the collective, she gets a thrill from uncovering and revealing the hidden threads that are woven together to create our paradigm.

Her passion for this existential detective work aligns well with her unique approach to one on one client work, as she helps others to discover the building blocks of their archetypal blueprint, and mythic overtones. She does not believe that astrology is static, and therefore works with clients to develop strategies and practices that allow them to transcend challenging aspects of their natal chart.

She lives on the Shores of Lake Erie with her husband, four kids, and Cat, Oscar (the grouch).

These days, when she isn’t interpreting a natal chart, or translating the stars for her astrology blog, you can find her engaging in one of her favorite pandemic pastimes, unraveling her inner “good girl”, cultivating the ability to thrive in the deep, dark, unknown, or playing her favorite game of identifying fun paradoxes called “two things are true at once”.

https://www.RedMoonRevival.org

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contact Damascena here